The Official Muzungu Guide to Ugandan Wedding
The wedding invitation is on your desk. You’ve RSVP’d. You’re looking forward to celebrating your Ugandan colleague’s big day, but you don’t know what will happen, what to wear, when to arrive. Don’t panic. Help is here. The UGANDA BLOG’s ‘Mzungu guide to Ugandan weddings’ will let you take part in the celebrations without embarrassing yourself. (Please note, however, there is nothing that we can do about your dancing!)
The ‘Introduction’
Common in most Ugandan cultures is the ‘introduction’ ceremony or cultural marriage, known as ‘kwanjula’ in the central region. This marks the introduction of the groom and his party to the bride’s household and party. It is also the culmination of negotiations between the two families over the ‘bride price’.
A typical introduction will last around 3-4 hours, and will only kick off when the groom’s party has arrived at the bride’s father’s house. The ceremony involves the inspection of the groom and his party by the bride’s party, exchanges of questions and answers by the official spokesman for each side, ‘picking out’ the bride and groom from their respective parties, and ultimate acceptance of the groom and his gifts. Rings are sometimes exchanged and the cake is cut…they are now culturally man and wife.
What should I wear?
Do not underestimate the value of wearing traditional Ugandan attire to the ceremony. Even if you feel ridiculous, the effort that a bazungu (hint: that’s you!), of any nationality, puts into participating through dress cannot be underestimated. You might feel out of place but, remember, this day isn’t actually about you. Ask your friends and colleagues if you can borrow traditional dress for the day, or if your friends are all attending the same function, or you are a regular attendee of introductions, consider getting a local tailor to make you the garments, particularly if all of your friends are attending the same function as you.
Ultimately, it is your host (either bride or groom) who should guide you in what it appropriate and expected of guests, and they won’t mind being asked. This will depend on how traditional the families are, and what region they are from. For example, if they are from the central region, women will be expected to wear brightly coloured gomesi, and men kanzus over their suit trousers, and under a suit jacket. Men from the western region will be expected to wear office suits and ties, while woman traditionally wear mwenda. If you do wear western dress, ensure that it is clean, pressed and generally ‘smart’. Save the tight and revealing clothes for your nights out.
Should I bring gifts?
Again, your host should advise you how you can contribute. If you are attending on the bride’s side, ask the bride if you can contribute to the food that the bride’s family is expected to prepare for the guests. Otherwise, you might want to consider contributing to the church marriage ceremony which may come months, or even years, after the introduction.
The groom is expected to provide a range of gifts to the bride’s family in order to gain the all-important ‘yes’ of acceptance. The provision of these gifts is done through a series of fund-raising meetings which usually produces a list of items which require contributions. Rather than pick out a gift yourself, ask the groom how you could contribute to the wedding list.
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